


An Absolute Disaster™

by cluelessdoodle



Series: chat fic hell bb [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: F/F, Lots, M/M, Memes, Song Lyrics, chat fic, mostly from tanaka n noya, wowowow
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-08
Updated: 2017-06-28
Packaged: 2018-10-13 18:04:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10518993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cluelessdoodle/pseuds/cluelessdoodle
Summary: hinata starts a group chat and meme hell breaks loose. this was never a good idea.





	1. hello and welcome to memes™

**Author's Note:**

> first fic haha. give suggestions for later chapters

**sun crow** created **karasuNO**  
April 1, 2017  
12:34 PM

**sun crow** added **kaGAYama, Daichi, sugamom, the yam, no why, NOYAAA, bestsenpai™, asahi, and enNO-SHITa** to the chat. 

**sun crow** : knock knock  
 **sun crow** : get the door  
 **sun crow** : it's shitstorm  
 **sugamom** : watch your language >:o  
 **sun crow** : shut up mom  
 **sugamom** : um rude  
 **kaGAYama** : Hinata WHAT THE _FUCK_  
 **kaGAYama** : Why did you have to steal my phone and rename this  
 **no why** : tbh that's the best thing shrimpy has thought of.   
**NOYAAA** : YOOOO  
 **NOYAAA** : NICE MEME REFERENCE THERE  
 **bestsenpai™** : were no strangers to loooovvee  
 **NOYAAA** : ryuu no  
 **bestsenpai™** : u know the rules  
 **bestsenpai™** : and so do i  
 **the yam** : _oh my god_  
 **asahi** : are you kidding me why  
 **bestsenpai™** : a full commitments what im thinking of  
 **no why** : I HATE THIS  
 **Daichi** : ????  
 **bestsenpai™** : you wouldn't get this  
 **bestsenpai™** : from any other guy  
 **sugamom** : NOT EVEN AN HOUR INTO THIS GROUP CHAT  
 **sugamom** : AND THERE ARE ALREADY MEMES  
 **bestsenpai™** : i just want to tell u how im feeling,,  
 **Daichi** : Excuse me but what's a meme  
 **enNO-SHITa** : e-excuse me???...  
 **no why** : i cannot believe  
 **sugamom** : have you actually not been around this team for more than 5 seconds  
 **NOYAAA** : WAIT WHAT THE F U Ck  
 **bestsenpai™** : WOW OKAY I WAS GONNA KEEP SPAMMING BUT  
 **the yam** : fUCk-  
 **sugamom** : did  
 **sugamom** : did you just swear???  
 **no why** : im  
 **NOYAAA** : CURRENTLY DYING LMAO  
 **sun crow** : omg yamaguchi,,  
 **no why** : lmao you still owe me ten bucks yam  
 **bestsenpai™** : i cannot believe you bet on this iM  
 **Daichi** : ???Someone explain???  
 **kaGAYama** : Can I explain  
 **NOYAAA** : NO THIS IS GOLD  
 **kaGAYama** : Yeah it's true  
 **asahi** : i left for one second  
 **asahi** : and i come back 2 this shit  
 **bestsenpai™** : ITS HOW THIS GAY AS HELL TESM WORKS  
 **the yam** : tsukki why did we ever bet on this  
 **no why** : :))))))  
 **sugamom** : im  
 **sugamom** : wtf is happening??

**sugamom** has left the chat. 

**sun crow** has added **sugamom** to the chat.

**no why** : wtf  
 **Daichi** : Why won't anyone tell me?  
 **Daichi** : I even asked Fukurodani's ace.   
**no why** : like that guy would tell you  
 **sun crow** : BOKUTO SAN!!!!  
 **no why** : endinf xkxjjI8iiwi"/@:3  
 **kaGAYama** : What happened with Tsukishima  
 **no why** : hHui im sttuckki andn im gayundndxid  
 **no why** : mckaldpel my;/  
 **sugamom** : TSUKISHIMA ARE YOU ALRIGJT  
 **no why** : YMamgUCji what trjfckc  
 **sun crow** : "yamaguchi what the fuck"  
 **asahi** : how did you translate that?..  
 **no why** : JXKSM SMXSVPA39&  
 **NOYAAA** : ding dong  
 **NOYAAA** : it's the outside world  
 **asahi** : now isn't the time noya  
 **NOYAAA** : saying what the fuck is happening over there lmao  
 **bestsenpai™** : 3  
 **sun crow** : 2  
 **NOYAAA** : aaaannnd 1  
 **sugamom** : TSUKITRASH ARE YOU O KAY  
 **kaGAYama** : No he's Tsukishima  
 **NOYAAA** : DID YOU JUST DAD JOKE  
 **bestsenpai™** : wow you beat daichi im  
 **enNO-SHITa** : alrighty what bs did i miss this time  
 **the yam** : hi there im back~  
 **sugamom** : YAMAGUCHI WTF DID YOU DO

**the yam** has gone offline.

**no why** : WHAT THE F U C k  
 **no why** : YOU CANY HUST????  
 **no why** : DO THAT??  
 **sun crow** : lmao ok im gonna ask him wtf happened over there

**sun crow** and **the yam** messages.

**sun crow** : yams  
 **the yam** : kissed him lol

**the yam** has gone offline.

**sun crow** : what the fUC K

end of messages

**sugamom** : concerned  
 **asahi** : umm what the hec k

**sun crow** has sent _WHAT.png_

**sugamom** : HECK  
 **sugamom** : YE A H  
 **asahi** : you really need to stop shipping the team  
 **Daichi** : I mean he's right.   
**sugamom** : i love you but no  
 **sugamom** : NOW ITS TWO OUT OF SIX!!!  
 **enNO-SHITa** : um what  
 **NOYAAA** : HOTL FUCK  
 **asahi** : oh  
 **asahi** : O H  
 **bestsenpai™** : IM CRYINGN  
 **sun crow** : bwahahaholyshit  
 **kaGAYama** : Oh  
 **kaGAYama** : WELL THEN  
 **sun crow** : saltyshima here hasn't said anything for like 3 minutes now

**no why** has gone offline

**sun crow** : there we gO  
 **NOYAAA** : brb  
 **sugamom** : wait holy shIT  
 **NOYAAA** : no im just gonna get meme food  
 **sugamom** : OH GODDAMMIT  
 **asahi** : suga no  
 **sugamom** : there it goes  
 **sugamom** : the negative shit  
 **asahi** : im not even saying anything  
 **sun crow** : mom senses  
 **asahi** : right

end of chapter


	2. Shenanigans™

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ENJOY!!

5:05 PM

**saltbag** : what the fuck  
**m o m** : hinATA  
**shit** : this isn't that bad for me thank god  
**BROSENPAI** : you're gonna jinx it  
**NICE RECUEVE** : IT WASNT EVEN SPELLED RIGHT IM DISAPPOINTED  
**sun crow** : eHEHEHEHE  
**fuckeyama** : Oh my GOd  
**D A D C H I** : Oh boy.  
**ASSahi** : why are you like this  
**NICE RECUEVE** : NOW T H A T S TRUE  
**NICE RECUEVE** : a nice one in fact  
**saltbag** : i  
**ASSahi** : WH????  
**ASSahi** : thank you??? i think  
**sun crow** : :OO  
**sun crow** : NISHINOYA SENPAI TEACH ME YOUR WAYS  
**m o m** : DID I HEAR SOMETHIGN  
**D A D C H I** : Suga, no.  
**m o m** : SUGA Y E S  
**yamaGUCCI** : suga yes  
**m o m** : YEAH BOI  
**saltbag** : yamaguchi why  
**yamaGUCCI** : sry tsukki  
**fuckeyama** : There it is  
**D A D C H I** : You forgot to call Hinata a dumbass.  
**NICE RECUEVE** : LMAO DAICHI YOURE RIGHT  
**m o m** : im so pROUD  
**ASSahi** : why haven't we changed our names yet  
**shit** : loudly shrugs  
**D A D C H I** : How do you "shrug loudly"?  
**m o m** : sh don't question it too much,,,

3:07 AM

**NICE RECUEVE** : some b o D Y  
**BROSENPAI** : oNce t o l d me  
**m o m** : "SHUT UP ITS THRREE AM”  
**NICE RECUEVE** : oh my gOd  
**BROSENPAI** : i ain't the shalsrpets took in the s he d  
**NICE RECUEVE** : wait shit i can see him running down my street  
**ASSahi** : good luck surviving, not helping you bye  
**NICE RECUEVE** : BETRAYAL  
**NICE RECUEVE** : ryuu run  
**BROSENPAI** : ARE YOU GONNA BE OK

**NICE RECUEVE** is OFFLINE.

**saltbag** : oh my god  
**D A D C H I** : SUGA NO  
**m o m** : brb

**m o m** is OFFLINE. 

**saltbag** : how did i ever end up staying on this team  
**ASSahi** : don't know

7:07 AM

**NICE RECUEVE** is ONLINE.

**NICE RECUEVE** : OK IM ALIVE  
**NICE RECUEVE** : SOMEHOW  
**saltbag** : dang.  
**yamaGUCCI** : tsukki,,,,  
**NICE RECUEVE** : GEE THANKS TSUKISHIMA

**NICE RECUEVE** changed name to **survived suga**

**survived suga** : there  
**BROSENPAI** : hOLY SHIT  
**BROSENPAI** : didn't think you would make it out ALIVE??  
**survived suga** : DAICHI HELPED  
**survived suga** : THANKS  
**D A D C H I** : *thumbs up*  
**m o m** : do n o t  
**survived suga** : fuc-  
**m o m** : spam the chat with memes at three am  
**m o m** : next time u will not survive  
**fuckeyama** : Isn't that a bit extreme  
**fuckeyama** : Also hi  
**yamaGUCCI** : hi kageyama  
**sun crow** : why can't we meme at 3AM!!!  
**sun crow** : it's the perfect time for meme-ing!!!!  
**sun crow** : >:O  
**saltbag** : oh look  
**saltbag** : the King™ is here.  
**fuckeyama** : HOW MANY TI ME S HAVE I TOLD Y OU TO NOT CALL ME THAT  
**saltbag** : 14, 15 now.  
**yamaGUCCI** : he keeps track  
**ASSahi** : ????why would you keep track of that

**m o m** added **kiyoko, anxious™, ki no shit a,** and **nah rita** to the chatroom. 

**ki no shit a** : WOW YOU FORGOT US  
**nah rita** : So nice of you  
**sun crow** : I DIDNT KNOW YOUR ACCOUUUNTT  
**anxious™** : wait but you knew mine and??you didn't??add me,,??  
**m o m** : omg hinat a  
**D A D C H I** : We're sorry about that  
**anxious™** : i missed the Almost Murder of Nishinoya Yū™  
**anxious™** : wwow  
**nah rita** : Wow okay  
**shit** : what the fuck did i miss  
**sun crow** : MEMES  
**saltbag** : these idiots  
**shit** : suga you don't just kill your teammates  
**ASSahi** : yeah,.. don't think you should do that  
**m o m** : IT WAS THE ONLY RHING I COULD DO  
**D A D C H I** : Luckily, I was in time to stop him from committing mass murder  
**shit** : bless  
**anxious™** : wait um  
**anxious™** : couldn't you just mute this chat or something 

**m o m** has muted the chat.

**survived suga** : LMaooOoO  
**survived suga** : that was WILD  
**D A D C H I** : Wait how do you do that?  
**sun crow** : …  
**fuckeyama** : …  
**anxious™** : …  
**ASSahi** : …  
**saltbag** : …  
**yamaGUCCI** : ...  
**shit** : …  
**survived suga** : ...  
**kiyoko** : …  
**BROSENPAI** : …  
**nah rita** : …  
**ki no shit a** : …  
**D A D C H I** : ..?  
**D A D C H I** : Do you not know?  
**shit** : NO ONE TELL HIM  
**D A D C H I** : Sigh  
**D A D C H I** : Why are you guys like this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you liked this chapterrrrr!! new story comin up!


	3. well FU C K

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING FOR A WHILE WHOOPS

6:45PM

**sun crow** : HEYA BITCHES  
 **fuckeyama** : Wonderful greeting  
 **survived suga** : lmao u shoulda said heya hoes  
 **survived suga** : it WORKS BETTER  
 **m o m** : did someone call me  
 **BROSENPAI** : IM GONNA CRY  
 **fuckeyama** : I thought you muted this chat  
 **sun crow** : well u thought wrong i guess  
 **sun crow** : H A  
 **sun crow** : AND NOYA UR RIGHT  
 **sun crow** : im ashamed of myself  
 **survived suga** : NO DONT BE  
 **survived suga** : u did well son  
 **m o m** : i needed this daily dose of memes  
 **saltbag** : why the fuck  
 **yamaGUCCI** : wow okay  
 **ASSahi** : i just realized  
 **ASSahi** : everyone could have changed their names by now  
 **ASSahi** : why haven't we done that yet  
 **yamaGUCCI** : idk were too lazy or sth  
 **sun crow** : YOU KNOW WHAT

**sun crow** added **space boi** to the chat.

**saltbag** : B Y E

**saltbag** has left the chat. 

**yamaGUCCI** : ok no u have to suffer with us

**yamaGUCCI** added **saltbag** to the chat.

**space boi** : yahoo!~  
 **space boi** : (^-^*)/  
 **survived suga** : oh god he uses kaomoji   
**D A D C H I** : Hinata why did you add him  
 **space boi** : yamaguchi what do you mean by suffer???  
 **space boi** : (T_T)  
 **saltbag** : someone please stab me with forks multiple times  
 **saltbag** : or let me starve  
 **sun crow** : wow some real hate there  
 **sun crow** : to The Grand King™©  
 **yamaGUCCI** : wait what do you mean by starve  
 **saltbag** : i haven't eaten all day wowie  
 **yamaGUCCI** : TSUKKI WH A T  
 **space boi** : glasses kun you gotta stay he a l t h y~  
 **saltbag** : can u maybe not with the kaomoji  
 **space boi** : (´‐ω‐）=з i didn't even send it yet!  
 **space boi** : g o s h  
 **D A D C H I** : Why are you here?  
 **space boi** : well you see,,  
 **yamaGUCCI** : w h a t  
 **yamaGUCCI** : ok that's it im going to your house  
 **yamaGUCCI** : with f o o d  
 **anxious™** : I CAME AS SOON AS I HEARD  
 **anxious™** : the  
 **anxious™** : the ships  
 **sun crow** : y a c h i i s a s h i p p e r  
 **space boi** : oh hello......would u happen to be one of my fangirls?????  
 **anxious™** : yeah, yeah. "yahoooo im oikawa and i pretend im straight but im really gay for my best friend I W A C H A N"  
 **survived suga** : CRYING  
 **space boi** : i   
**ASSahi** : what  
 **fuckeyama** : Oh my god  
 **anxious™** : dONT JUDGE ME-  
 **anxious™** : for the ships  
 **anxious™** : and the roast  
 **anxious™** : even tho it's quite obviously T R U E  
 **ASSahi** : did  
 **ASSahi** : did you make a hamilton reference??  
 **anxious™** : YES  
 **anxious™** : anyway  
 **anxious™** : tsukkiyama is great  
 **sun crow** : ts....tsukkiyama  
 **space boi** : at least you don't get something that looks slightly like the word yaoi   
**anxious™** : IT PRACTICALLY IS THO  
 **fuckeyama** : Is anyone else involved in this...shipping?  
 **kiyoko** : What do you think kageyama???  
 **kiyoko** : She has a shipping chart  
 **survived suga** : kIYOKO  
 **BROSENPAI** : KFKSDNSN  
 **anxious™** : lemme find it brbr   
**ASSahi** : oh god

**anxious™** sent _gay volleyball nerds.png_

**sun crow** : OH KIYOKO EASNT KIDDING  
 **ASSahi** : im kind of scared  
 **space boi** : do you have one for every te am??? ovo  
 **anxious™** : ...no  
 **ASSahi** : oH  
 **m o m** : well u got me n daichi, the married couple so good for u  
 **D A D C H I** : What is this team at this point?  
 **sun crow** : um yACHI  
 **anxious™** : because it's cute  
 **sun crow** : i didn't even ask the question  
 **anxious™** : i can  
 **anxious™** : um  
 **anxious™** : read ur mind  
 **saltbag** : SOMEONEHELP YAMAGUCHIS MAKING ME MAKE SCRAMBLED EGSG  
 **space boi** : g o o d f o r y o u, a n t i k a o m o j i h o e •v•  
 **survived suga** : BWAHAHAHSHAHA  
 **BROSENPAI** : WAITEIATIWAIT ME AND ENNOSHITA?v??vv  
 **survived suga** : look man  
 **survived suga** : everyone knows you're gay for him ok  
 **BROSENPAI** : just like everyone knows ur gay for glass heart over here  
 **fuckeyama** : Me and Hinata??????  
 **fuckeyama** : EXPLAI N-  
 **space boi** : does it even need an explanation ???  
 **anxious™** : for once you're right  
 **anxious™** : didn't expect that  
 **ASSahi** : ok let's all   
admit it  
 **D A D C H I** : Everyone on this team is gay as hell.   
**m o m** : ...yeah pretty much  
 **anxious™** : what happened with tsukkiyama over here  
 **m o m** : apparently tsukishima didn't eat anything all day  
 **m o m** : w HICH YOU SHOULDNT DO THAT  
 **saltbag** : h e l p  
 **sun crow** : hmm...  
 **sun crow** : nah  
 **shit** : what the absolute fuck is this  
 **space boi** : YAHOO uwu  
 **shit** : oh god  
 **yamaGUCCI** : OOEOEIOASF  
 **shit** : oh _god_  
 **shit** : tsukishima are you ok  
 **shit** : is yamaguchi murderinng you  
 **saltbag** : can you like  
 **saltbag** : NOT DESTROY THE PLACD RIGHTJ NOW  
 **ASSahi** : should we help them  
 **shit** : no

7:37PM

**space boi** : now you're all going to LOVE me for this~  
 **shit** : wait is anyone else slightly concerned for what happened to tsukishima

**space boi** added **cat games, NYAFUCKER,** and **HOOTAFUCK**

**m o m** : oH GOD MORR PEOPLE  
 **HOOTAFUCK** : hoot hoot motherfucker  
 **saltbag** : you know i was gonna tell you what happened but no thanks

**saltbag** has left the chat. 

**sun crow** added **saltbag** to the chat.

**sun crow** : GASP  
 **sun crow** : KENMA BOKUTO KUROO  
 **cat games** : pls no  
 **HOOTAFUCK** : GASP MY SON  
 **m o m** : hi excuse mE he's my son  
 **HOOTAFUCK** : FUCK  
 **NYAFUCKER** : bro u gotta steal him  
 **HOOTAFUCK** : HELL YEHA BRO  
 **cat games** : yeah cause kidnapping is an absolutely logical and legal option  
 **space boi** : (*^▽^*)  
 **space boi** : this was a great idea  
 **saltbag** : N O I T W A S N T  
 **space boi** : oh cOME ON YOU ALL LOVE ME  
 **space boi** : （*´▽｀*)  
 **space boi** : right???  
 **sun crow** : uh  
 **fuckeyama** : No  
 **saltbag** : n o t h a n k s  
 **survived suga** : LAUGHS  
 **space boi** : I FEEL SO OFFENDED  
 **space boi** : (ᗒᗩᗕ)՞  
 **anxious™** : lmao  
 **space boi** : EVERYONE HERE IS SO RUDE!!!  
 **cat games** : if you wanna leave then leave  
 **fuckeyama** : He's right  
 **space boi** : no fuck you  
 **NYAFYCKER** : gladly  
 **HOOTAFUCK** : oh my god bro u don't jusT.,,  
 **sun crow** : did he just

**cat games** has left the chat.

**sun crow** : KENMA NOOOO

**NYAFUCKER** added **cat games** to the chat.

**sun crow** : YAAY  
 **cat games** : ugh  
 **BROSENPAI** : IC ANNOT BRLEIEV  
 **survived suga** : no one escapes   
**BROSENPAI** : E V E R  
 **shit** : isn't that kinda  
 **BROSENPAI** : no  
 **shit** : okaY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact at some point i forgot oikawa was in the group chat so i jsut


	4. pretty heckin gay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING I WILL UPDATE MORE FREQUENTLY BUT TH CHAPTERS WILL BE SHORTER

4:38 AM

**NYAFUCKER** : nya

**HOOTAFUCK** : hoot

**sun crow** : caw

**NYAFUCKER** : nYa

**HOOTAFUCK** : h o o t

**sun crow** : cA W

**saltbag** : stop

**NYAFUCKER** : NO

**HOOTAFUCK** : HOOT

**NYAFUCKER** : N Y A

**saltbag** : i hate you all

**sun crow** : cA W

**HOOTAFUCK** : WE LOVE YOU TOO

**HOOTAFUCK** : HOOT

(cut for lengthhh)

9:42 AM

**nah rita** and **ki no shit a** muted the chat.

**shit** : should we add them back-

**survived suga** : hOLY FUCK WHAT DID I MISS

**yamaGUCCI** : oh my god 294 unread messag e s

**saltbag** : please help

**space boi** : this is aMAZING

**HOOTAFUCK** : ikr oikawa

**NYAFUCKER** : you're welcome we're so nice

**D A D C H I** : You're really not, but okay.

**anxious™** : cHOkes on drink??????

**BROSENPAI** : holy shIT DAD ROAST

**m o m** : oikawa why the fuck would you add them

**space boi** : because i am the most wonderful person uwu

**yamaGUCCI** : you're really not

**saltbag** : that's a basic fact yams

**yamaGUCCI** : i know but

**space boi** : i feel personally offended???????

**anxious™** : yAms?????? holy shi t

**sun crow** : lmao

**saltbag** : shut ur fucc

**fuckeyama** : Says the beanpole

**BROSENPAI** : yeah like we're EVER gonna shut up :)

**anxious™** : u know u love us tsukishimaaaaaaa

**NYAFUCKER** : that applies to usss s ss

**cat games** : i can say for a fact that that is not true kuro

**NYAFUCKER** : kenma that is

**NYAFUCKER** : definitely true

**HOOTAFUCK** : tsukki my bro

**saltbag** : don't call me that

**HOOTAFUCK** : :(

**cat games** has muted the chat. 

**sun crow** : aw dammit

**sun crow** : you kno what???

**fuckeyama** : I stg hinata

**sun crow** added **tol** and **shut uP** to the chat

**m o m** : oh,, more people,,,,,

**anxious™** : t r e e s

**ASSahi** : are you making some sort of cryptid dear evan hansen reference

**anxious™** : ...maybe

**space boi** : ha nerds

**fuckeyama** : Says the one who's obsessed with space

**tol** : w h o

**NYAFUCKER** : well henlo lev

**tol** : don't kill me thanks

**shut uP** : If anyone's gonna kill you its me

**NYAFUCKER** : wiTH YOUR GAYNESS

**fuckeyama** : Kuroo everyone here is gay

**anxious™** : i think tsukishima is the gayest tbh

**saltbag** : ok shut up

**anxious™** : yOU DIDNT DENY IT-

**saltbag** : f u c k i n g he l l

**yamaGUCCI** : well i mean

**yamaGUCCI** : she's not wrong tbh

**sun crow** : but what about kageyama

**fuckeyama** : Excuse me what

**anxious™** : tru but,,,,,,,,

**space boi** : i fucking swear

**anxious™** : ^^^^^!!

**space boi** : even the cute manager!!!! w h y

**fuckeyama** : Bcs ur gay as hell. 

**space boi** : can you hear me sobbing.

**saltbag** : oh _i wish_

**survived suga** : im?? crying????

**HOOTAFUCK** : tsukki P L E A S E

**saltbag** : i hATE YOU

**HOOTAFUCK** : i love u too~~~~

**ASSahi** : im

**ASSahi** : what is this and what is happening

**m o m** : gay and gay

**BROSENPAI** : yeah pretty much

**ASSahi** : i can't argue with that tbh

**anxious™** : yeah

**NYAFUCKER** : fucking OVbiously

**HOOTAFUCK** : on a scale of gay to ULTRA SUPER GAY this group chat is ULTRA SUPER GAY

**fuckeyama** : That is

**fuckeyama** : VERY correct

**anxious™** named the chat **ULTRA SUPER GAY**

**BROSENPAI** : ABOUT TIME

**anxious™** : ill be back gonna make a gayness chart of all the teams

**ASSahi** : AGAIN WITH THE REFERENCES

**anxious™** : yOURE THE ONE GETTING THEM

**yamaGUCCI** : let's just agree that ben platt is great ok?

**yamaGUCCI** : ok

**sun crow** : ??????

**anxious™** : what do u mean "??????"

**sun crow** : what are u talking about

**anxious™** : iM

**anxious™** : someone educate him, gotta make the gay chart

**saltbag** : -yachi hitoka, 2017

**yamaGUCCI** : im gonna put that on a wall

**D A D C H I** : What happened

**shit** : gay

**m o m** : just

**m o m** : gay

**D A D C H I** : Yeah makes sense

**sun crow** : who?? is?? ben?? platt??

**yamaGUCCI** : bye im gonna go die now

**saltbag** : is everyone here musical trash

**fuckeyama** : ?????

**yamaGUCCI** : i can hear tsukki internally screaming

**saltbag** : no you can't

**BROSENPAI** : don't tell me lil tsukishima kei here is also a musical nerd??v

**yamaGUCCI** : is the sky blue, is water wet, etc

**survived suga** : i m

**saltbag** has muted the chat.

**yamaGUCCI** : :(

**BROSENPAI** : what did we expect to happen

**yamaGUCCI** : he lives off of music

**survived suga** : we can te l l,,,,,,,

**yamaGUCCI** : i feel like all the teams are gonna be at the same gay level on the thing yachi is doing

**m o m** : yea that's true

**m o m** : everyone is pretty heckin gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i will update this in like a day i swear and soz this chapter was short


	5. that's pretty heckin gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> iM AN IDIOT AND FORGOT I DIDNT OOST THIS HECK!!! NEXT CHAPTER CONING SOON THO OHO ;)

4:38 AM

 **NYAFUCKER** : nya

 **HOOTAFUCK** : hoot

 **sun crow** : caw

 **NYAFUCKER** : nYa

 **HOOTAFUCK** : h o o t

 **sun crow** : cA W

 **saltbag** : stop

 **NYAFUCKER** : NO

 **HOOTAFUCK** : HOOT

 **NYAFUCKER** : N Y A

 **saltbag** : i hate you all

 **sun crow** : cA W

 **HOOTAFUCK** : WE LOVE YOU TOO

 **HOOTAFUCK** : HOOT

(cut for lengthhh)

9:42 AM

 **nah rita** and **ki no shit a** muted the chat.

 **shit** : should we add them back-

 **survived suga** : hOLY FUCK WHAT DID I MISS

 **yamaGUCCI** : oh my god 294 unread messag e s

 **saltbag** : please help

 **space boi** : this is aMAZING

 **HOOTAFUCK** : ikr oikawa

 **NYAFUCKER** : you're welcome we're so nice

 **D A D C H I** : You're really not, but okay.

 **anxious™** : cHOkes on drink??????

 **BROSENPAI** : holy shIT DAD ROAST

 **m o m** : oikawa why the fuck would you add them

 **space boi** : because i am the most wonderful person uwu

 **yamaGUCCI** : you're really not

 **saltbag** : that's a basic fact yams

 **yamaGUCCI** : i know but

 **space boi** : i feel personally offended???????

 **anxious™** : yAms?????? holy shi t

 **sun crow** : lmao

 **saltbag** : shut ur fucc

 **fuckeyama** : Says the beanpole

 **BROSENPAI** : yeah like we're EVER gonna shut up :)

 **anxious™** : u know u love us tsukishimaaaaaaa

 **NYAFUCKER** : that applies to usss s ss

 **cat games** : i can say for a fact that that is not true kuro

 **NYAFUCKER** : kenma that is

 **NYAFUCKER** : definitely true

 **HOOTAFUCK** : tsukki my bro

 **saltbag** : don't call me that

 **HOOTAFUCK** : :(

 **cat games** has muted the chat. 

**sun crow** : aw dammit

 **sun crow** : you kno what???

 **fuckeyama** : I stg hinata

 **sun crow** added **tol** and **shut uP** to the chat

 **m o m** : oh,, more people,,,,,

 **anxious™** : t r e e s

 **ASSahi** : are you making some sort of cryptid dear evan hansen reference

 **anxious™** : ...maybe

 **space boi** : ha nerds

 **fuckeyama** : Says the one who's obsessed with space

 **tol** : w h o

 **NYAFUCKER** : well henlo lev

 **tol** : don't kill me thanks

 **shut uP** : If anyone's gonna kill you its me

 **NYAFUCKER** : wiTH YOUR GAYNESS

 **fuckeyama** : Kuroo everyone here is gay

 **anxious™** : i think tsukishima is the gayest tbh

 **saltbag** : ok shut up

 **anxious™** : yOU DIDNT DENY IT-

 **saltbag** : f u c k i n g he l l

 **yamaGUCCI** : well i mean

 **yamaGUCCI** : she's not wrong tbh

 **sun crow** : but what about kageyama

 **fuckeyama** : Excuse me what

 **anxious™** : tru but,,,,,,,,

 **space boi** : i fucking swear

 **anxious™** : ^^^^^!!

 **space boi** : even the cute manager!!!! w h y

 **fuckeyama** : Bcs ur gay as hell. 

**space boi** : can you hear me sobbing.

 **saltbag** : oh _i wish_

 **survived suga** : im?? crying????

 **HOOTAFUCK** : tsukki P L E A S E

 **saltbag** : i hATE YOU

 **HOOTAFUCK** : i love u too~~~~

 **ASSahi** : im

 **ASSahi** : what is this and what is happening

 **m o m** : gay and gay

 **BROSENPAI** : yeah pretty much

 **ASSahi** : i can't argue with that tbh

 **anxious™** : yeah

 **NYAFUCKER** : fucking OVbiously

 **HOOTAFUCK** : on a scale of gay to ULTRA SUPER GAY this group chat is ULTRA SUPER GAY

 **fuckeyama** : That is

 **fuckeyama** : VERY correct

 **anxious™** named the chat **ULTRA SUPER GAY**

 **BROSENPAI** : ABOUT TIME

 **anxious™** : ill be back gonna make a gayness chart of all the teams

 **ASSahi** : AGAIN WITH THE REFERENCES

 **anxious™** : yOURE THE ONE GETTING THEM

 **yamaGUCCI** : let's just agree that ben platt is great ok?

 **yamaGUCCI** : ok

 **sun crow** : ??????

 **anxious™** : what do u mean "??????"

 **sun crow** : what are u talking about

 **anxious™** : iM

 **anxious™** : someone educate him, gotta make the gay chart

 **saltbag** : -yachi hitoka, 2017

 **yamaGUCCI** : im gonna put that on a wall

 **D A D C H I** : What happened

 **shit** : gay

 **m o m** : just

 **m o m** : gay

 **D A D C H I** : Yeah makes sense


	6. well shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> HINATA FREEKS OUT

(PRETEND ITS JUNE 14TH OK)

**sun crow** : gehhh

**anxious™** : this is ur punishment for stealing the drinks hinata

**space boi** : excuse me wHAT

**anxious™** : sugas birthday party was yesterday and hinATA STOLE HIS PARENTS VODKA-

**sun crow** : Kill Me Now™

**HOOTAFUCK** : I DONT KNOW WHETHER TO BE CONCERNED OR TO FEEL PROUD

**sun crow** : yachi,,,,, my friendn,,, why didn't you dO ANYTHINg

**anxious™** : hinata......i practically shoved water down ur throat and sent u a link for cures im

**sun crow** : wait how come i didn't say anything here

**anxious™** : you thought the first years gc was THIS gc

**survived suga** : wHT BOKUTO YOU SHOULD OBVI FEEL BOTh-

**HOOTAFUCK** : UR RIG H T 

**BROSENPAI** : wHAT DID I COME BACK TO

**BROSENPAI** : AND OMG WHAT DIF HE SAY

**cat games** : in what way could you be pROUD of this??

**anxious™** : ??? u h

**anxious™** : also sory tanaka but i Cannot tell you that

**sun crow** : oh

**sun crow** : oH N O

**HOOTAFUCK** : i neED AKAASHI

**cat games** : i,,,ok then

**cat games** : ...are you ok hinata

**HOOTAFUCK** added **pls leave** to the chat.

**fuckeyama** : I sensed a new setter in the chat so

**sun crow** : NO I AM NOT OK AND wTF

**BROSENPAI** : im cRYIGN WHAT

**survived suga** changed their name to **meme boi**

**meme boi** : FUCKINNF PERFECT

**pls leave** : Hi what did you need

**HOOTAFUCK** : SHOULD I FEEL PROUD OR CONCERNEND

**pls leave** : Is,,, is that even a question??

**HOOTAFUCK** : AHA!! so i should feel PROUD!!

**pls leave** : tHATS NOT WHAT I MEANT BOKUTO

**sun crow** : aaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA

**anxious™** : hinATA ITS OK

**ki no shit a** : hi what im back here

**sun crow** : yaChi,,,, how is this oKAY-

**BROSENPAI** : WHAT HATH HAPEPENDN

**HOOTAFUCK** : MY SON

**shit** : ...how is daichi not here right now

**saltbag** : lol suga and daichi are probably like....making out or some shit like that

**meme boi** : sometimes i wonder how you were like the second person to get in a relationship but

**meme boi** : HINATAAAA

**sun crow** : hAHA IM DEAD

**fuckeyama** : ??? What

**anxious™** : haha nothing

**meme boi** : HOLY SHIT I HAVE A THEORY

**anxious™** whispered to **meme boi**

**anxious™** : IF IT HAS ANUTHIGN TO DO WITH KAGEYAMA SHOOSH

**meme boi** : GASP I WAS RIGHT

back to gc vv

**meme boi** : ITS PROBABLY WRONG THO

**saltbag** : oh?

**saltbag** : the first years gc?

**yamaGUCCI** : shshhsh

**fuckeyama** : hi what???

**anxious™** : ITS NOTHING I JUST SHOWED HIM A MEME

**anxious™** : ahem,,, anyway about the gay chart-

**yamaGUCCI** : WHOS THE GAYEST I NEED TO KNOW

**yamaGUCCI** : i mean what

**anxious™** : umm i think karasuno nekoma and aoba johsai are the Top Three

**anxious™** : (aj just bcs of oikawa [soz])

**space boi** : am i supposed to be honored or offended because-

**anxious™** : idk, both i guess??

**saltbag** : oH

**saltbag** : O H

**saltbag** : HAJDHSJDJ I CSNNOT BELIEVE

**yamaGUCCI** : guys help tsukki is hecking dYING RN

**meme boi** : what the fUCK

**pls leave** : Well i have a theory and i think it might be right

**pls leave** : But hey this is,,,slightly amusing

**HOOTAFUCK** : !!!!!

**HOOTAFUCK** : DID MY VV PRETTY SETTER JUST CALL THIS AMUSING!!!!

**sun crow** : i am Dying™ but not like saltyshima

**anxious™** : he's a mESS

**anxious™** : sORRY

**sun crow** : yachi..,,, my pal,, what do u have to be sorry about ,,,

**fuckeyama** : ????

**sun crow** : thnk fuc

**m o m** : IM BACK AND WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED

**anxious™** : UHHH NOTHING

**m o m** : something obviously DID happen yachi,,,,,

**anxious™** : UM OK ILL TELL YOU

pm vv

**anxious™** : so like hinata got drunk bcs the party wow

**anxious™** : and like,,,, he messaged the first year group chat a lot of things

**anxious™** : and they were all like

**anxious™** : Normal Drunk Texts

**anxious™** : BUT UM

**anxious™** : there was this one text,,, that he probably definitely regrets

**m o m** : !! TELLTRLLTELL

**anxious™** : "hhavev i evebr told yooy gust howo mixh i llve kajayeyamam" -him

**m o m** : FUCKIGNF FINALLY

**anxious™** : i forgot you were The Shipper

gc vv

**m o m** : A SDJSHSXJSCN JJSK

**m o m** : FUCKIGNG FINALYL

**sun crow** : YACHI WHY

**anxious™** : i diD NOTHING IM INNOCENT

**sun crow** : yachi pls kill me now thank u vv much

**fuckeyama** : oh

**fuckeyama** : o H

**sun crow** : FUCK

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> listen i would make this chapter longer but i love cliffhangers ok


	7. OHOHOHOHO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> HERE IT IS,,, ENJOY

**sun crow** : IWHSKWIFOSJA B Y E

**sun crow** left the chat.

**anxious™** : AHH HECK

**fuckeyama** : Why did he leave???

**m o m** : AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

**meme boi** : YACHI WHAT HAPPENED IM ACTUALUL KINDA CONCENTNED

**D A D C H I** : WHAT HAPPENED

**anxious™** : ok ok um umm

**anxious™** : so like there were normal drunk texts in the first year gc and uhh

**anxious™** : "hhavev i evebr told yooy gust howo mixh i llve kajayeyamam"

**saltbag** : _i cannot believe_

**yamaGUCCI** : _T S U K K I_

**saltbag** : yikes ok

**meme boi** : _HOLY SHIT_

**pls leave** : Well

**pls leave** : things got....interesting

**D A D C H I** : _O h_

**D A D C H I** : So THATS who he was talking about

**m o m** : e

**m o m** : excuse me???

**anxious™** : ummm,, guys should we add him back??

**saltbag** : for once in my life im actually curious on what the king has to say

**yamaGUCCI** : T S U K K I

**D A D C H I** : Uh Hinata told me that he liked someone and???

**shit** : how fuckin oblivious do you have to be for that

**space boi** : W E L L

**space boi** : i say we add shrimpy™ back and let my kouhai say what he has to say :)

**anxious™** : ok thansk

**anxious™** added **screams??** to the chat

**saltbag** : well finally, a good idea

**saltbag** : give me mercy yams pLease

**screams??** : JDSKC YACHI WHY

**pls leave** : Has anyone noticed that kageyama's typing on and off?

**screams??** left the chat. 

**anxious™** : yikes

**pls leave** : Well then

**NYAFUCKER** : EMO SETTER S AY SOMETHING

**fuckeyama** : S O M E T H I N G

**HOOTAFUCK** : oOoOoOoOo

**HOOTAFUCK** : iS SOMEONE IN WUUVV

**fuckeyama** : .

**HOOTAFUCK** : holy SHIT

**fuckeyama** : ok maybe a little bit-

[message deleted]

**anxious™** : !!!!

**m o m** : IM L I V I N G

**saltbag** : oh?! he has FEELINGS? for SHORTY over there? MAN! that was SO UNEXPECTED

**yamaGUCCI** : ,,,ok that's actually good sarcasm

**anxious™** : oH

**m o m** : SCREENSHOTTED AND SENT

**D A D C H I** : Suga please

**NYAFUCKER** : well isn't this just gay as all hell

**HOOTAFUCK** : ..,.,,,and you're the one saying that

**m o m** : brb lemme just

[dm]

**m o m** sent _AAAA OMG.png_

**m o m** : IM SCREAMKYNNG

**screams??** : EXCUSE ME WHAT

**m o m** : hE DELETED IT BUT IM CRYING

[group chat]

**pls leave** : This was

**pls leave** : expected

**HOOTAFUCK** : HOW DO WE GET MY SON AND EMO SETTWR HERE TOGETHR

**D A D C H I** : Hinata is not your son-

**NYAFUCKER** : what a dAD

**m o m** added **screams??** to the chat.

**screams??** : YELLS???

**anxious™** : hINATA

**fuckeyama** : U M

**fuckeyama** : I DID NOT

**fuckeyama** : APPROVE OF THSI

**space boi** : soOOoOoo

**space boi** : since we aaalll know ur super gay for each other,,,,,

**space boi** : does this mean you guys are dATING??? ;)

**BROSENPAI** : I WOULD LIKE THE ANSWER TO THAT

**m o m** : BITCH ME TOO-

**saltbag** : literally everyone knows the answer but oh well

**screams??** : iF YOU WANT TO U H

**screams??** : bE MY BF I GUESS?????

**fuckeyama** : ....oK you dumbass,,,,

**m o m** : I AM PUTTING THIS ON MY WALL, THSI IS A BLESDED DAY

**screams??** : aAAAA

**ASSahi** : holy hell how did i miss all of this

**meme boi** : watch ur motherfucking language bitch-

**ASSahi** : ok then and cOngrats u two wow can this team get any gayer

**HOOTAFUCK** : MY SON

**HOOTAFUCK** : WAIT BRB

**NYAFUCKER** : ARE YOU THINKING WJAY IM THINKINF BRO

**HOOTAFUCK** : https://youtu.be/1Bix44C1EzY

**HOOTAFUCK** : YES BRUH

**m o m** : ALSO WAIT BRB

**m o m** changed **screams??** 's name to **gay for tobio**

**m o m** changed **fuckeyama** 's name to **gay for shoyō**

**m o m** : AND DONE

**yamaGUCCI** : wow like two seconds into their relationship and it's already relationship goals

**gay for tobio** : OK MY USERNAME IS VV ACCURSTE

**saltbag** : are you saying we aren't relationship goals yaMs

**D A D C H I** : Congrats you two!

**gay for tobio** : thanks dad

**gay for tobio** : i mean what

**gay for shoyō** : Everyones called him dad at this point dumbass

**gay for tobio** : u rlly don't have any other insult than dumbass™ do u

**pls leave** : Wait for it

**anxious™** : inahles

**ASSahi** : yachi pls

**NYAFUCKER** : AWWWW youre gonna say something like hes YOUR dumbass

**gay for shoyō** : um

**gay for shoyō** : cANNOT CONFIRM THAT

**pls leave** : There it is

**gay for tobio** : :(

**gay for shoyō** : ....Ok maybe i CAN confirm it but

**saltbag** : yachi if the,, "ships" get together at this rate are we gonna be number one on the gay chart

**anxious™** : uhhhmm can't confirm that

**anxious™** : cause if some of the other teams is in this group chat then they can tell us what happens

**saltbag** : well

**HOOTAFUCK** : im so pORUD,,, my crow son got a BOYFRJEND

**D A D C H I** : HES NOT YOUR SON-

**NYAFUCKER** : H A! "NOT A DAD" MY A S S

**D A D C H I** : W hy

**gay for tobio** : WHY NOT

**gay for tobio** : also if someone has a list of all the relationships tht are happening pls add me n kags over here on the list thx

**Author's Note:**

> yeah boi first chapter and there's chaos


End file.
